Oh Baby!

Hey.

Back so soon?  I know.  Cra- to the -zy.

Last night I had my last pre-baby hair appointment.  Gotta take care of those grays, you know.

Who wore it better?

Anyway, the lady doing my hair this time was a mom of five, so we had a lot to talk about compared to the last time I went in and had a girl who was totally freaked out by baby kicks.  She shared stories, offered advice, asked me lots of questions about how I was feeling and preparing, and it was nice.  Before I left she even gave me a hug and told me to come back with baby pictures next time I get my hair done.

I've found that it's too easy to focus on everything but the baby while I'm pregnant.  On one hand, I feel that I am constantly thinking about it, but on the other, I almost forget about it.  Let me explain.

The fact that there is something living and growing and moving inside me is hard to forget.  My life is filled with reminders.  Whether it's my ever-expanding middle, or my frequent need to visit the restroom, or that I sometimes forget to open a door wide enough for me to fit through, or that I'm not able to do some of the physical things I never paid much attention to a few months ago (like making it all the way in up the stairs and in the door with all the groceries in one load), or the the fact that I don't sip on wine on Scandal night along with the other girls, I am reminded that things are not the same.  

There's other stuff too.  The spare room looks like a baby's room now.  There's detergent that smells like baby with the rest of the laundry supplies.  People ask about it all the time.  Swaddle blankets, burp cloths, diapers and wipes are now stationed around the apartment.  An infant car seat is in the living room, waiting to be strapped into the car when the time comes.  A stroller is sitting in our entryway.

Then I have my fears.  You know... the hospital, what my body is going to go through, a crying baby... what my body is going to go through.

I have all of these reminders around me daily, hourly, and yet I sometimes forget about the baby.  I am consumed with preparations and body changes and a future that looks different than what we're used to.  And I don't think that's necessarily bad.  It is a huge change, bringing so many new things into play that I/we now have to think about- like childcare and pumping and teaching someone that we don't throw rocks at people. 

And then, it hits me.

It's not just a baby.  It really is a little person.  A little person that will grow up with quirks and attitude and hopefully a speech impediment where he/she can't say "r's" for a while.  A little being with feelings and love and humor.  A little boy or girl that, even if I'm not a mom who instantly connects with her baby at birth, will rock my world and teach me so much about love and sacrifice.

I remember how much I love the boys I nannied for, and how my heart broke when it was time for us to move because I wasn't going to see them all the time.  How, even if they were working my nerves, I loved them, and a single sweet word or drawing or funny little dance would melt me.

I remember my nieces and the amazing amount of joy they have brought into all of our lives.  The first time I heard "Aunt Maimee" and the snapchats saying "miss you!" that made me cry.  How much I am going to miss being there to see them grow over the next four years.  The giggles and the cuddles and "up please's" that keep me falling in love with them all the time.  

And then I remember that we are going to have our own.  And it won't just be a little alien being that changes everything we know.  It will, but it will be so much more than we can even imagine yet.

And theeeeen, if possible, I become even more overwhelmed than I was before.

But we'll make it.  We're almost there.  If you're keeping track, we are now two weeks from estimated due date.

Talk to you later.

Aim

Thoughts at the End

Hi.

So, as the impending arrival of a small human into our lives becomes more and more real to me, there have been a few thoughts circling my brain over and over.  Naturally, if I have to deal with them, I want to burden you with them too.  You are so welcome.

(He's feeling it too.)

I've shared before that I thought I'd have a fit and active pregnancy... before I got pregnant.  Once I got pregnant, I realized how naive I was.  I've ended up having a rather lazy pregnancy.  I started to get back on track towards the end of the second trimester, but then other things like getting the nursery ready and having a huge stomach got in the way.  Other things just took priority.  And even though it's clear that Jered thinks I should be more active, he's been fairly understanding given the circumstances.

However, the time of semi-valid excuses is coming to an end.  Even if I still have a couple of months before working out is suggested, my eating habits are going to need to start going back to normal.  They have been extremely lax, and I've gotten away with it because I'm pregnant.  Something tells me that my late night milkshake runner is going to be less eager once I no longer have the "I'm growing a person" or "J wants ice cream" excuse.

(He staggered the paintings so we didn't have to worry about having them 

even... I didn't do such a hot job when I tried it that way.)

I'm staring down the fact that even after J exits the premises I'm not going to look like my old self.  I'm thinking that will be even harder than looking in the mirror now because at least right now I can say there's a baby in there causing this bump.  Not to mention the physical changes that are going to be even crazier than what's already going on.  (Although I'm hoping my skin settling down is one of those changes.)

I've also started mourning our, especially my, free time...  That might sound terrible, but with steamy summer weather around the corner, I'm thinking about the fact that Jered and I can't just pick up and go out on the boat on any given afternoon and spend hours in the sun.  It seems especially difficult to face because during our last bit of "just us" time I haven't been up to doing those things that I'm losing.  I mean, last year, Jered and I literally lifted his boat into the truck and then pulled it into the lake by ourselves.  That hasn't exactly been a possibility with my physical condition during these last few warm weeks.

I sound like I think being a parent is a death sentence for freedom, and it's not that I don't think life will ever get back to semi-normal, but it's going to be a long time before we can pick up and go like we used to.

(Things are coming together bit by bit!)

It's a really (here's my favorite phrase again) strange feeling to go to bed each night, wondering if I might wake up with labor pains.  Or the thought that my water might break when I'm walking on the skywalk to lunch one day.  Or to simply have a huge question mark over the next few weeks even though there is actually stuff written on the calendar.  It's a little terrifying to be honest.

Jered's confident as ever.  (Although I wonder if he is as calm, cool, and collected as he appears because he's been grinding his teeth a bit at night.)  But he is at least keeping it together enough to talk me down when I get overly nervous, which at the moment, mostly has to do with what my body is expected to do in the hospital.

At least I know I "got [him] for life now," (he thinks he's so funny) as we finally got a tattoo band for him.  We've gone through FIVE rings now.  No more.  No more.  

Well, hope you loved every minute of dipping into the pregnant lady's brain today.  It's a picnic, huh?

Aim

Whirlwind Ahead

Hi.

Should I start with a fishing update?  I thought you'd like that.  Well, this weekend Jered went out to check the poles, and when he got home, he came straight up to the apartment with some groceries.

"Nothing, huh?"

"Not necessarily."

What does that even mean?

So we traipsed on down to the truck and he shows me this guy.

Not too shabby, eh?  It's close to the size of the one he caught in Mississippi last year.  So he filleted it up, and we now have a full freezer again.  He's planning on having a Flinkman family fish fry next week.  And I say, more power to him- less work for me!

He didn't only bring home goodies for himself this weekend though.  Look what he got me!

Yes, he worked his Craigslisting ways and got us a great deal on this like-new couch.  It's so soft and pretty and bright and not frumpy looking like our old, albeit comfy, couches.  He and Jake made this big, pregnant lady a veeeeery happy girl by moving it in this weekend.  It's only about a gazillion times more comfortable than the bony futon.  

(Please note the teeny-tiny clothes air-drying on the treadmill.  They are all washed and smell like baby now.)

The mister has also been working on my car for what seems like forever.  Before the trip to Canton, he changed the brake pads because they had been sounding horrific for about a month, and I was convinced that I was going to slide to my death because they were bound to go out at any moment.  (And he thinks I'm dramatic...)  He also decided to rotate my tires because it's been forever since that was done.  

But then the car started wobbling.  The steering wheel shook, it made a weird sound, you could feel the vibration in the pedals.  It just didn't seem right.  We waited it out before checking on it again until after we got back from Canton.  Jered picked me up from work last week and said, "Oh, I found out why the car is shaking.  We probably shouldn't drive it home..."  He then proceeds to show me that the front driver-side tire is shredded on the inside.  And I'm thinking "OUR TIRE COULD HAVE EXPLODED AT ANY MOMENT OVER THE LAST WEEK OR TWO?!"  (Not dramatic.)

Well, all is well with the car world for at least another week I'd say.  Tyler loaned us me (I'm not about to drive the pick up) his vehicle for the rest of the week/end, Jered got another tire, and my car no longer tries to live out T. Swift's song.  Thank goodness.

All joking aside- I'm feeling incredibly grateful for God's protection on that one.

In other news...

Over the last few days, my thought process looked a little something like this:

So Jake's graduation, and the next big Flinkman family visit(!), is coming up soon.  I keep picturing it on my calendar towards the end of the month.  Only... "towards the end of the month" is now next weekend.  How did that happen already?

...  

Nate and Jess's wedding must be coming up soon too because they're getting married on the last Saturday of the month.  Oh wait- that is just a week after Jake's graduation.  How did that happen already?

...

Um, our child's expected due date is during the first week of June.  Now, hold on.  That is less than a week after Nate and Jess's nuptials!  HOW DID THAT HAPPEN ALREADY?

It's really strange to be thinking in terms of weeks and not months now.  (If we make it another month without meeting him/her, I'll probably be begging to be induced.)  I visited the doctor yesterday, and the appointments have taken a major turn from being mainly "Do you have any questions?" to "So if this happens, head to the hospital."  Insert Aimee gulping and laughing nervously.

Well, maybe one day we'll get back to something other than just a weekly recap around here, but for now that's the big news.  Just a crazy few weeks ahead.

Talk to you later.

Aim

One More Month

Hello hello.

How in the world are we a week into May 2015 already??  Do you realize what that means?  That means everyone, except Kelly and me, have now had their babies.

Ok, maybe that's not strictly accurate, but it certainly feels like it.  Since our niece was born in November, I think I've counted ten babies born to people we know from high school, college, or family.

When is it our turn?  Well, let me remind you: according to our due date, less than a month!  Today marks 36 weeks for us.  We watched our baby update on the app this morning, and it said J is the size of a small cantaloupe.  *Gulp*  Anytime there, buddy...  I'd rather not feel what comes after cantaloupe.

I seriously can't wait to take full breaths, sleep on my stomach, and be nimble again.  Mom thought J was starting to drop, but my lungs and ribs have been disagreeing with that thought over the last two days.  I got in the car yesterday and had to catch my breath because Baby was allllll up in my chest.

Starting next week, our doctor appointments are weekly ones!  Reality is starting set in.  The idea of the hospital staycation we have coming up is suddenly looming right before my eyes and isn't just some distant possibility anymore.  The idea that it could really happen at any time is exciting and terrifying all at once, and I'm becoming paranoid with every new feeling or happening in my body, constantly asking Jered, "What do you think this feeling is?  Do you think this is how labor starts?"

Mom and Kate threw a great baby shower for us this weekend.  It was really cute.  See that big hedgehog down there?  That's a piggy bank!  Isn't it cute?  The little kiddo is loved for sure, and I had such a fun time with everyone.  It was great to sit and talk, over-eat tasty food (just me?), and decorate onesies together for little J.

 

 

I loved the end result- everyone did such a great job.  The onesies are adorable.

We ended up having an impromptu cookout later that afternoon.  It was absolutely perfect outside!  It was such a nice time, and I'm convinced they all need to move to Des Moines.  Even later that afternoon, Mom, Kate, and I walked to Katie's house to hang out for awhile.  She's got it fixed up nice and homey; we sat and talked for a couple hours before heading back home for an ice cream date with Dad.  

Our weekend wrapped up with playing cards at The Farm.  Well, most of us played cards.  Jered fished and asked Grandpa for supplies that he could fashion a spear out of to catch bullfrogs.  He kills me sometimes.

In fishy news, Jered sent me another picture of him with the monster (presumably from Tyler's phone).  It really shows off the size of the fish, don't you think?  I still can't believe it.  I was thinking the other day about how I had been wanting to rent paddle boards at the lake this summer, and how that idea seems a little less appealing when I imagine one of those in the water with me.

We've had this little guy for over a week now.  He's really quite lovely, minus his bulldog under bite.  Last night he gained eleven roommates, and I'm secretly hoping that when Jered takes them out to the river to string up, he forgets this one.

Well, that's about it.  We're in the midst of trying to wrap up last minute planning.  Hopefully within the next couple days we will have the nursery completed and final preparations made.  The car seat is actually in our car, albeit in the box, but hey- it's there.  So just a few more bare necessities, and we'll be set.  At least materially.  Mentally, we'll see...

Until next time.

Aim