The end of another, shorter chapter...

The summer is over.

I mean, if you look at the calendar, it will tell you that it isn't. Actually, in some ways, it isn't over for me either. It isn't as though I have to go back to classes this week along with everyone else. However, that is where my mind has been traveling back to for the last few weeks. My brain keeps bouncing off a glass wall separating me from TIU, and it is a really, for lack of a better adjective, weird feeling.
Very few students think they will ever say they can't wait to go back to school, yet it is where I am longing to be now. At the beginning of the summer, I was ready to never sit in another class again, to never take notes again, to never have another deadline for class...

After eighteen years of doing just that however, I feel a little lost without it.

More than that, I will miss TIU. As much as students can complain about it, it is a wonderful place. I find myself missing the simplest things. Little things that I won't enjoy here at home.

I will miss seeing Dr. Graddy walk across campus with his winter hat, and listening to his devotionals in class. I miss the feeling of getting ready in my suite, and listening to the hilarious conversations of my friends. I will miss seeing the same people on the sidewalks, in classes, and in the dining hall, that I have seen for the last three years. I am sad that I will never watch Jered play another football game. I miss having class with the same people every year, getting to know them better, and becoming great friends and spending hours studying, or trying to study in the computer labs *cough*Bek*cough*. I miss feeling like I'm a part of "Chicago suburbia." I will miss the convenience of living next door to great friends, where they are always just a few steps away.

I will miss going to Pie Day with everyone, especially Jered, Jeremy, and Kelly, going to the beach with them and Bam and Myriam, and late nights at Dennys.

I will miss seeing Jered dressed up in his football swishy-suit. I miss eating dinner with the guys. As much as I complained about it, I will miss going to band and sporting my sass. I will be sad to be unable to have a random movie night in the suite with the girls, or to watch Adolf and Miss B running around the suite scaring Megan.

I will miss climbing up on top of the press box at night to enjoy massive clouds, millions of stars, and the last of the warm fall breezes. I will even miss those horribly cold walks across campus in the winter.

Have I made my point yet?

In case I haven't, or you missed it, I will miss TIU more than I thought I ever would. I will miss the fun times, the annoying hassles, and the people.

I suppose this is on my mind because last week I helped Katie set up her dorm room, and today I helped Jered pack up the car to go to school, and I feel lonely and nostalgic.

Hm... This isn't where I intended this blog to go, so if you will be patient, I will get on with it. Sorry for the lengthy tangent. Perhaps, the rest will carry a slightly happier mood with it.

This summer seems to have flown by quicker than I could have imagined. There were things I dreaded, and things I was nervous about, and clearly, I am not all too thrilled with where things are going now. However, I did end up having a wonderful summer. Here are some highlights:

I started out with a fabulous trip to Ukraine. I had more fun than I expected, made wonderful friends, and was able to see God work in many ways.

I spent a few precious days at my grandparents' house in Mississippi.

Jered spoiled me for my birthday.

We enjoyed spending time with friends before a wedding, and had quite an adventurous weekend as a result.

We had fun girl days.

We took a fun-filled vacation to Branson. Jered rode his first roller-coaster, and we all laughed at his expense. We also sat through hours of rain to enjoy a baseball game.

I read fun books to my heart's content.

I was able to visit Jered and his family a couple different times, including his birthday weekend.

Now as look to the upcoming school year that I will not be a part of, I am sad. I know it is only for a season, and that there is a purpose for me where God has me, but I am still in the process of understanding His ways. In the meantime, I am determined to find ways to break up this year into smaller increments filled with fun.

Bring on the paints, books, and writing!

Tears into Laughter

I started my new job today. I am the new receptionist cashier at Sam Leman Dealership.

It was the worst. first. day. ever.

I'll start with last night. I was having the typical night-before nerves, just like I always had before the first day of school. I went to bed extra early to ensure that I wouldn't be too tired, and I set my alarm to give me an hour to get ready. Then I decided that I wanted to give another hour to allow myself extra time to eat and prepare.

I awoke this morning when the sun peeked through my blinds. My alarm hadn't sounded yet, so I figured I would get a few more minutes of sleep before I needed to get out of bed. When I opened my eyes later, I still hadn't heard my alarm, so I decided to look at the clock to see how much time I had left.

One hour.

Unfortunately, it wasn't an hour left of blissful sleep that I had, but an hour before I had to be at my new job, which is at least 45 minutes away from my house.

Needless to say, I bolted out of bed, washed my face, threw on the clothes that I had thankfully pulled out last night, and pulled my hair back. There was no time for make up. There was no time to straighten or curl my hair. There was no time to iron my clothes. I ran downstairs, brushed my teeth, and burst into nervous, angry tears as I hopped into my car.

In my rush to exit the driveway, I backed into the flowerbed.

Then I had to stop to put enough gas into my car to get me to work.

I was a few minutes late. I went in to see my new boss, apologized for being unable to come in for the drug testing previously because I had been out of state, and she said that was fine and began to give me the directions to where I needed to have the testing done. She told me that I would fill out my paperwork when I returned.

The place was less than 5 minutes away. It took me over 30. I called my dad to ask for directions, and he told me to ask someone. I was crying again. I stopped at a bank, and they couldn't help. I called the place, but they had to transfer me to a different branch. They gave me directions from where I was, and I went inside to see if I was at the correct place.

No such luck. She gave me more directions, and I finally found the right building. I went to the desk and signed in, but when I was asked for my photo id, realized I had left it in the pocket of my shorts when I went to the DMV two days ago. She asked me if I had any kind of photo id, and I sure didn't. She had to call my new boss and ask her to describe me. How humiliating. Again- on the verge of tears.

But the humilitation doesn't end there. I walked to the back and was handed a clear plastic cup.

Great.

By the grace of God, I was able to fill it. Talk about awkward- walking out in the hall with an open cup of bodily fluid to give to the nurse. Luckily, that was the end of that.

I made it back to work in just a few minutes, and spent the next hour filling out paperwork.

Then it was to the phones, where I could never remember the correct order and constantly mispronounced names. I spent the rest of my time doing this.

So I get to go back tomorrow and try the whole thing over again... I hope without the embarrassing parts, and definitely without the sleeping in thing. I would love to go in and feel confident about the way I look at the very least.

Now as I tell the story, I am able to laugh because it seems like something that should happen in a reality t.v. show. At the time though.... well it was just a bunch of tears and anger. I put on a happy face while I was at work, partially out of nerves, and I will keep doing that, but I hope that the nerves die down, and that things run a little more smoothly.

Eventually the nerves will be gone, and God will turn those tears into pure laughter, but as of right now, the laughs are still a little damp.