Elephant on a Tightrope

It's November!  It's November!  It's November!

Oh, hi.  How are you?

I'm a little fond of November if you didn't notice.  I guess I never really even realized how much I love this month, but it struck me this morning how wonderful it is!

It's where fall slips into winter, when the sentimental, family traditions really start, and when Thanksgiving and Christmas are constantly in the back of my mind.

I just read on Pinterest that to help make your home smell better, you can put two caps of vanilla extract in a coffee mug and cook it in the oven at 300 degrees.  Naturally, I'm trying it as soon as we get home.  Thanks to Molly for pinning that tip!

I am also about to start a "Holiday To Do" list for Jered and me.  Whether it's regarding gifts we need to purchase or put together, or dates we need to have, or food we need to make, it's going on the list, and it will get done!

This morning I watched an all time favorite: Dumbo.

I went through a phase when I was younger, where I loved elephants.  I wanted to collect them.  Nothing ever really came of that, although I did talk my parents into buying a souvenir book about elephants when we were on vacation one year.

Disney nerd that I am, I watched the commentary version of the movie too.  Some fun facts about the movie include: 

• Dumbo's mom also plays the mean, older elephant and Cinderella's fairy godmother.
• Dumbo saved Disney after Pinnochio and Fantasia bombed at the box office.
• Due to an oncoming strike at Disney, Dumbo almost wasn't completed.
• It was supposed to be on the cover of Time magazine, but Pearl Harbor happened.
• To save money, Dumbo was purposefully made simpler than the previous films.

Interesting, isn't it?  I never really thought of Disney ever being in financial trouble.  How ironic that a timid, outcast, baby elephant saved it all.

 

Isn't this picture wonderful?  I found this on Pinterest as well, and I fell in love with it. 

This is something that Jered and I have talked about a great deal recently.  Last time we were at my house to visit, Jered asked my parents if I had ever tried out for sports.  (Resounding no, obviously.)  Of course, there was the failed attempt at tumbling, when I got hurt every week, and the horrific year of dance classes, but that was all.

"I bet she could have been good if she had tried," Jered told them.

"She was afraid she wouldn't be the best, I think," was Dad's answer.

Well, I always knew I was afraid.  Afraid of getting hurt, afraid of not being liked by the rest of the team, afraid of not being good at all.  But maybe I wasn't just afraid of being the worst, but of not being the best.  I don't know.  That could be a stretch.  Although, I was afraid to even try art classes, which I would have loved.  That was definitely because I was afraid of how much better other people were going to be compared to me.

Lately, this topic has come up between Jered and me in relation to job searches.  It's becoming clearer and clearer to me that this is a real fear in me.  I don't like failure, so why attempt something where I might experience just that?

This leads me back to that sermon from Pastor Rich a month or so back.  My grown up fears.  Failure is a big one.  Huge.  I start to wonder how many things I missed out on because of it, but that's no fun, and I don't think that's where God would want me to place my focus.  That's more of where the devil is making his appearance in my life.

So instead, I'm going to brainstorm some times where I pushed through my fear of failure and came out on top with something even better:

• I was afraid of taking an art class, but in my last semester at SRC, I took one and really became comfortable with my style and gained some confidence in my work.
• I was terrified of playing in band at TIU because my skill was far less than those around me, and I had no friends in band.  I didn't feel like I fit in there.  Miracle of all miracles, my skill improved more than I would have thought possible, even enough that Dr. Posegate had enough confidence in me to cover the 1st part when we were down in numbers for a semester.  Most importantly, I made amazing, lasting friendships for which I cannot thank God enough.  If any of you are reading this, I love you so, so much!
• I was afraid of rejection and putting feelings into a one-sided relationship.  I ended up marrying the man of my dreams.  He may lick his lengthy mustache out of the corner of his mouth and wear an ugly pink trucker hat, but I still like him.

Ok, so these may seem silly to you.  You may be wondering why these were such big hurdles for me, but that's just my nature.  I don't like change, I don't like failure, I don't like the pressure of being in the spot light, I don't like feeling inferior, and I don't like being hurt. 

Through these experiences, God revealed Himself in big ways to me.  It might not mean much to you, but that's why they were my experiences and not yours. =)

I guess that's why I love that picture.  If anyone stands a chance of getting across a tightrope, it's probably not an elephant.  But whether it's an elephant tied up in a balloon in case he falls off, or taking a chance on a poor, baby elephant with big ears to save an animated film company, or me, just trusting in God when I put myself out there, we should "Dare to fail."

Well, this has been a little more "rambly" than I had planned, but at least I got what's been on my mind lately, off my chest.  Next time, I plan to go through some more of my notes.  So, until then, Happy November!  Enjoy some hot coco and a nice fire in the fireplace if you can!

Later!

Aim