Slow Learner

I learned a new word today: Gadole. It means great. Props to my Sunday School teacher, Rebekah.

I've been reminded of an old word this week: Humility. Props to God... for having a sense of humor.

I never thought of myself as a particularly proud person. (Yes, I did recently mention that pride led to the downfall of a haircut,but I wouldn't consider that my normal personality.) However, this week I've felt that God has been working on my heart and reminding me that being proud is a mistake.

And now, to humble myself a little more, I should tell you that last week's sermon was on having a humble heart, and I didn't remember that all week until I went to church this morning. Oh me, oh my.

I guess what I've been led to imagine this week, is that if I allow myself to be truly humbled, then, and only then, will I be ready to do the gadole things God has called me to do.

This summer I read Riven by Jerry Jenkins. It was... depressing, for the majority of the book. I don't want to tell you all about it because then you won't feel the need to read it, and you should read it. I will tell you this: the main characters made the greatest difference for Christ when they had hit rock bottom and looked to Him. Consider yourself warned: grab a tissue.

This week I finished Wicked by Gregory Maguire. It was... highly disappointing. I know what you're thinking. "How can something that is so wonderfully magical on stage stink so badly on paper?" I was wondering the same thing. I'm not saying you shouldn't read it... I would appreciate hearing someone else's thoughts on that bit of literature. Anyway, throughout the story, Elphaba is struggling with the thought of possessing a soul, and she is determined to make a difference. But in the end... it's questionable if she has or not.

Last night, I felt as though I needed to read something more uplifting. I read Jonah, Titus, and Philippians. You know what I found? Ideas like this: "Remind the people... to be obedient, to be ready to do whatever is good, to slander no one, to be peaceable and considerate, and to show true humility toward all men..." and "do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others. Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus..."

Well, by golly, I think that maybe, just maaaaybe, He's trying to tell me something.

Perhaps, my thinking that I was humble, was actually pride. Does that make sense? So here I am, wishing that God would use me in some gadole way, and I'm not allowing Him to because I'm harboring pride in ways hidden even to me.

My goal this week: to figure how to put all of this into practice...